Our First Days With Jianna

We are all exhausted so I haven't been keeping up the blog. I have a good report though. Things are improving much with Pei-Pei and she seems to be accepting us more and more.

We saw her smile for the first time yesterday when she spotted Vickey decorating the gift bags with stickers. When Vickey gave her stickers she was so excited. They are now friends for life. Who knew? I could have saved a bundle on clothes and gifts! :)

I, on the other hand am going to have a much tougher time winning her over. She gladly receives all the nice new clothes and presents I have for her so that helps but for most of the time she makes sure I know she is mad at me for being her new Mommy.

She likes her Daddy. When she is very upset, he is the only one who can pick her up and comfort her. They have had their moments as well. She hauled off and smacked him in the head during the adoption ceremony in a fit of temper much to the dismay of everyone in the room. Fortunately, that has been the only incident of violence. What a temper she has!

Since then it has been really sweet seeing Ron and his little girl. She has to sit by him in the van and at mealtime. I bring her little toys to play with and she turns her back and won't play with me then she takes them to Ron. I'm actually okay with this since she at least has someone she will let comfort her. I also think it has something to do with Nathan since I catch her watching us together and it seems to make her a little angry. I'm not sure why.

Nathan has been getting stressed the last couple of days. He wants to go home and he gets very sad sometimes. Then other times he is the silliest boy and seems to be having a great time. He and Jianna are slowly getting used to each other. He doesn't want her touching his toys and books but I brought special things just for her and he reluctantly accepts this. Today he is trying to be good to her and tried to hug her a couple of times although she wasn't having any of it.

Today has seen some great moments. This morning she smiled at me for the first time while I was giving her a bath and playing with her. I'm so glad she likes baths. She said, "Shih shih, Mama" when I gave her a new outfit this afternoon. We had a bit of a stressful day because we visited the orphanage. After the last two days of her crying so hard to go back, I was surprised to see how unhappy she looked to be visiting. Although she cried when we left, she perked up very quickly and was glad to go back to the hotel.

This evening I brought out a little swimsuit for her and she got so excited. We went to the pool and didn't stay long because the water was cold but it was a good experience. I don't think she has been swimming before. She voluntarily let me hold her and clung to me in the water and even let me kiss her head and she didn't seem to mind a bit. I really enjoyed it. She was silly and happy when we got out of the pool.

Tonight she has been chattering away while she plays with her toys and it is such a joy to see that she is relaxing around us. She's very cooperative with repeating words in English and seems eager to learn.

I am amazed at this little girl and how far she has come in such a short time. She is working through all her emotions. We are getting to see her personality emerge in unguarded moments. The first couple of hard days are over. We began as strangers and now we are becoming a family.




The first pictures of my kids. Nathan is leaning toward her saying, "CHEESE!"

Our First Family Photos

These were taken on Tuesday when we went back to the Center for Foreign Affairs to finalize the adoption. Jianna is officially ours!

Our Together Day

We have our little Jianna

We dressed with care hoping to make a good impression on our little girl. When we walked into the Center I spotted her sitting on a couch. Her eyes became huge when she saw us. I sat down gently next to her and said, "Wo sher ni de Mama" which is "I am your Mama". She said in a small voice full of fear, "Mama". We repeated the same with "Baba" and then "Didi" (little brother) and she repeated back the words to us. Then she burst into tears and clung to her director.

It was hard watching her sobbing and begging her director Mrs Yang not to leave her with us. She wouldn't let me touch her or comfort her. Every time I said something to her in Chinese like "Don't be afraid" "It will be okay" or something reassuring, she stole a glance at me and cried harder. I don't know if my American accent saying Chinese upset her more.

During this time Nathan began crying so I held him on my lap while Mrs Yang was still holding Pei-Pei. Nathan said to her "Beah Koo!" which is "Don't cry". I can't even describe the look she gave him over that. They told her he was going to be a good didi.

When Mrs Yang left she was inconsolable and it was just heartbreaking to see her grief. She finally let Ron pick her up and hold her and we went back to the hotel.

So the night has passed with her grieving heavily and not wanting anything to do with us. We are patient. We know it will take time. It was hard to know if we should give her the space she wanted or invade her space with our presence. We took turns sitting next to her and she would turn away from us. I kept my arm around her and could feel her falling asleep while I was patting her back but she would jerk away when she began to relax too much. I finally got her to lie down on the little couch in her room. She was so exhausted. As we are moving around our room I can see her watching us sometimes as she tries to get used to these strange looking and sounding people. She rejected our offers of food and kept pulling snacks out of her coat which she ate. She was very resistant to us touching her and it took me about three hours to get her out of her coat.

At midnight I heard her stirring restlessly so I took her to the bathroom. Each time she consents to allowing us to do something for her it is so precious. She finally let me pick her up and I carried her into the bathroom where she was grateful to be able to go. Then I took her to wash her hands and she seemed very pleased to show me that she is able to wash and dry her hands on her own. When I took her back to her couch she let me tuck her in and kiss her head and then finally accepted the stuffed animal to cuddle.

So this first very hard day for my little girl is finally over. I expected that it was going to be really hard. We have been through this before and know that we will have to take each little concession she makes as a victory for our family. Eventually she will start to trust us more and each time she places trust in us, it will be such a precious gift.

Nathan has been wild and silly all evening. She was watching him as he bounced around the room playing with his toys. He doesnt want to share with her or to talk to her yet but that is understandable too. We've all got to grow together into our family of four.

We will go back today to finalize the adoption.



Here's a picture of her after she couldn't resist anymore and finally fell asleep. We were able to move her then and lay her down.

Cable Car Ride--Mutian Yu section of The Great Wall

Nathan on The Great Wall

The Great Wall

We visited the Mutian Yu section of the Great Wall this time and took a cable car to the stop. We enjoyed it so much more than the last time when we went to the spot where the wall is wide and most of the tourist go. This section is in a beautiful little town set in the mountains. This section sits high in the mountains and is, of course beautiful and amazing. We had lunch in town and it was in an atrium. The food did not dissapoint. It is as good as I remember.

We still had to do quite a bit of climbing to get to the top of the hill where the cable car began to take us the rest of the way up the mountain.

Inside a parapet.

We enjoyed the enclosed cable car ride!

Vickey climbed the wall like a champ! She has been a big hit everywhere we go -- probably because she is always smiling ear-to-ear. A funny thing is that everyone seems to love her coat and she gets lots of comments on it.

The cable car station. This was such a pretty little town!

Nathan's Favorite Part was the cable car ride.

The wall in the background is unbelievably steep!

This is the most awe-inspiring landmark I have ever visited. Its impossible to capture the grandeur of it with photographs. It goes on forever.

So far we have had an amazing trip and have received so many kindnesses from people. The airport in Beijing waived all our overweight luggage fees. They kept sending us to the VIP lines. We have had great drivers and impromptu guides. We have been so blessed!

Photos from Beijing --Forbidden City

Views from within the Forbidden City. We had a great visit there. It was sunny and chilly but not too cold.


The Bird's Nest Stadium that was built for the Olympics

The Day Before

We leave tomorrow for China. As fate would have it we all three have the flu and feel terrible. I still have to finish packing and go to the store to get the food items. I have given up on the hope of cleaning so we can return to a perfectly clean house.

The up side is that I don't have the energy to be nervous.

Our Travel Itinerary!

Jianna's Sixth Birthday!

We received some new pictures from the orphanage! These were taken in November 2010.

We ordered a cake and had it delivered to Jianna Ai Pei for her 6th birthday on November 16th. Here she is holding the cake box.

The cake reads, "Happy Birthday Ai Pei". It was decorated beautifully!

It appears they had the cake at the primary school she attends. Maybe at recess?

We Leave In Less Than Two Weeks!

I found some pictures of Ai Pei on the Fuling Kids Website. These were taken in July 2010!

Our Consulate Appointment is on January 19th and we are leaving on January 5th!

Making Plans

We don't have our iternerary or Consulate Appointment confirmed yet but we expect it any day. In the meantime we are doing much to prepare for our upcoming trip. I've been looking at flights and hotels until my eyes ache. The very good news is that it is less expensive to travel this time of year and that is going to save us a bundle.

Putting in our leave requests makes this so much more real. We are getting so close!

TRAVEL APPROVAL!!!

We got our travel approval. Our agency asked us if we wanted to travel in January or the end of February. REALLY? You had to ask???

We are so excited!

Another Step Completed!

We asked about our Article 5 today which was submitted on November 4th. It seems like it has taken a long time for it to get here. This was the message I received:

"Your article 5 was picked up on 11/18, and forwarded to the CCAA on the same day. It takes the CCAA 3-4 weeks to issue the TA."

So we are on to step 8! We are almost done!

STEPS AFTER LETTER OF APPROVAL TO ADOPT:

1, SUBMIT YOUR I800 TO USCIS (SUBMITTED 10/05/10)
2. WAIT FOR PROVISIONAL APPROVAL FROM THE NATIONAL BENEFITS CENTER(NBC)
(2-4-WEEKS) (OURS WAS RECEIVED ON 10/23/10)
3. NBC FORWARDS YOUR I800 TO THE DEPARTMENT OF STATE. (ABOUT A WEEK)
4. AWAIT LETTER FROM NATIONAL VISA CENTER STATING THAT YOUR FILE HAS BEEN
CABLED TO GUANGZHOU (ONE-TWO WEEKS)
5. YOUR AGENCY WILL WALK YOUR LOA AND DS230(CHILD'S VISA APPLICATION) INTO THE
CONSULATE AT GUANZHOU. (THIS ONLY HAPPENS ON MONDAYS OR THURSDAYS)
6. WAIT FOR THE ARTICLE 5 (2 WEEKS)(Received 11/18/10)
7. ARTICLE 5 IS WALKED INTO THE CCAA IN BEIJING. (11/18/10)
8. WAIT FOR TRAVEL APPROVAL.(TWO TO FOUR WEEKS)(AFTER THIS WE CAN GET A
CONSULATE APPOINTMENT).

She knows about us!

Adele from "Blessed Kids" sent us an email confirming that Ai Pei received the birthday cake and her presents! This means that she knows that she has a family! I don't know why, but this makes me very happy. We sent pictures with the cake also just in case she didn't get the package we shipped to her from home with the photobook.

So she has seen us. I wonder if she will always remember the day that she saw the pictures of her new family. One of the unusual things about older child adoption is that a child will be able to remember the first time she sees her parents. I so hope that she gets the photo album with all the pictures of extended family and our home and pets.

So now maybe the orphanage staff is talking to her about meeting us and flying on an airplane for such a long journey and trying to prepare her the way that we are talking to Nathan about it.

Nathan Plays With Puppies

The weather was close to eighty degrees here today! We spent some time outdoors playing with puppies. The puppies are seven weeks old now and so much fun.

Nathan decided to roll across the front lawn. I love watching him play with puppies.

Jianna's Sixth Birthday

Ai Pei had her 6th birthday on November 16th. I never imagined last year that we would be missing this birthday as well but, alas that is the way of international adoption. We sent her a cake and presents so hopefully she received them okay in China and is enjoying them. I picked up a little cake and we remembered her birthday here.

It made me sad. Birthdays are milestones that remind me I am missing so much of her young life. I pray that wherever she is, she is feeling loved and cared for.

Next year, baby girl...